Monday, September 9, 2013

Inner Clarity

Let’s take a moment here and discuss an important topic that could have a significant impact on what direction the evening goes. 

You can be sure that since your date for the evening has agreed to dinner at your place or wherever the next date location is, she is interested in pursuing things further with you and often with women that can involve an emotional component.  That isn’t the case every single time, blanket statements always are dicey when discussing relations between the sexes, however, it’s a good approach to assume that there is that interest on her part, at least for the moment.  Now it is time for you to check in with yourself on this topic.  Women are much better than men as far as being in touch with how they feel, generally they’ll know if they want to sleep with a man within a few minutes (not that they would do it that quickly, silly, they connect on a deeper level) but this is an important time to consider where you are with this person in this regard. 

This isn’t about making a decision on marriage or anything as far-reaching as that, but you should have a sense at this point if the woman coming over for dinner is someone you’d like to date on a regular basis or you feel this will be a more physical, ‘friends with benefits’ type of situation.  Just spend some time with that thought, and get in touch with how you feel.  Once you have a good sense, file the information away.  You’ll need to remember it later, maybe even later this evening.

This thought process is important because it will help to differentiate between being a Good Bad Boy and being a Loser.  Women love a Good Bad Boy and they loathe a Loser.  It is vital you know what the differences are, as they may not be that obvious.  Some of the differences have been touched upon earlier, but as things progress between a man and a woman, the stakes get higher and higher, and it is important to be more diligent on this topic as things intensify.  We’ll get back to all this in just a short while.

So, at this point let the evening progress naturally, be comfortable and yourself, relax and let things flow.  Where many men get tripped up is having a big fat agenda in their heads, and letting it run the show.  Yes, we all know there is an agenda there, and she is aware of it as well as anyone else.  The important concept is to put it aside and not let it interfere.  Just relax, chat and act totally as if your intentions are as pure as the driven snow.  Obviousness is not sexy almost all of the time.  Get to know this person, show genuine interest and deepen the initial connection you’ve both established and progress it to the next level.  Expand on the subjects you spoke of the last time, and spend time getting a sense and feel of the woman you’re entertaining.  Take pleasure in the evening by staying in the moment, enjoying your dinner and being engaged in interesting conversation.  There is no substitute for practice, so just get in there, and start listening, asking those questions, building on the earlier concepts we spoke of.  Keep being flirtatious, smile and stay connected. 

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