Think or Swim......

Men, in their charmingly simplistic view, assume that if a woman wants him to take the lead that is a comprehensive invitation to advise and instruct on all matters and decisions in a woman’s life.  Nothing could be further from the truth.  A trip to the dance floor may assist us in clarifying this line of thought.

Many women love to dance, and many men, straight men that is, really aren’t that keen on it.  By dance, I mean real dancing, like salsa, ballroom or swing, with prescribed steps that are followed to a considerable degree.  What I’m not referring to is white boys flailing around on the dance club floor, looking as if a horde of fire ants have been dropped into their pants. 

Lets imagine a man taking a woman to the dance floor, and as they proceed, he tells her at every step and move what she should do, where to go, how he thinks she should move there, even though she is already skilled in the dance steps.  This will quickly become a miserable experience for the woman, who would not be questioned for kicking this man in the groin for such actions.  A woman would be understandably quite angry with this behavior, and at the time she storms off, this man would think, in a frustrated manner, “But she said she wanted me to lead!"

 

Now consider the same man taking a woman onto the dance floor, leading her through the dance.  He leads her as far as the structure of the dance with the music is concerned; he has his steps, and she has hers that juxtaposes with his.  It is a balanced equation, a symmetry that flows naturally, and no words need be spoken to have it be so.  A man, in this specific relationship, provides the blank canvas for the woman to fill with colors and definition.  A man allows the space for the woman to fill with her style, manner and grace.  It is lovely and sexy, and all of it done as a partnership.